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this post was submitted on 17 Jul 2025
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Random? I’m not seeing a 15 kg slab of raw horsemeat, no charred emu leg hanging off the side, no half digested contents of crocodile stomach, no unidentifiable roadkill from somewhere in Georgia (the country, not the state, but the state will do, too), no puréed human back meat, not even so much as a speck of walrus, ostrich, cassowary, kangaroo, or beluga; guess otters, marmot, geese, dog and cat (I don’t like it either, but they did say “random” ffs) don’t count as having meat…
The fuck do you mean, random? That shit’s about as well ordered as the unabridged Oxford English Dictionary, ffs.
You had me until you said that Georgia the state is acceptable. Totally shattered my suspension of disbelief.
Pretty sure the state has its fair share of roadkill, just the country
Thinly sliced roadside sun dried leg of pitbull?
The dog, or Mr. Worldwide?
Random might not be the right word, can we settle on "anonymous"?
It sounds a bit sinister, sure, but underscores the whole don't-ask-don't-tell nature of the contents of charcuterie nicely.
I was in a punk band called Anonymous Meat. Most of our songs were about masked orgies and charcuterie taste testing.
How about “arbitrarily chosen”?
Assorted meat? Meat arrangement? Selected meats? Meat clusterfuck? So many choices.