Who says no to the random meat? The surface is largely inconsequential, unless it's shit or uranium or somesuch.
use uranium to serve charcuterie, meat heats up, no one wants hot fuet and melted cheese :(
and they all died of radiation poisoning, the end
vegetarians, probably
I’d eat vegetarians even though they’d probably be tough and bitter.
grass-fed long pig
Yup, personally I prefer my wooden boards loaded with beans.
Ah, the magical fruit.
Cold cuts are a no from me - too unhealthy.
They're high in protein, iron, zinc, and b12. Good in moderation, like most things.
Not according to latest studies, there is no safe level of processed meat consumption.
Cold cuts are often processed, rather than delivered raw.
Secondary News Article: https://www.sciencealert.com/massive-review-finds-no-safe-level-of-processed-meat-consumption
Original Study: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41591-025-03775-8
consuming processed meat (at 0.6–57 g d−1) was associated with at least an 11% average increase in type 2 diabetes risk and a 7% (at 0.78–55 g d−1) increase in colorectal cancer risk.
So eating a gram of processed meat per day would significantly increase chances of type 2 diabetes, and colorectal cancer.
1 gram ≃ 0.03 ounces (British imperial units)
Feels like it would be easier to list what doesn't increase your risk of some horrible illness these days.
Fruit, vegetables, whole grains, exercise, some sunlight, some socialisation, an easy creative hobby.
You're right, it is easier to list those things.
some sunlight
Are you sure that doesn't increase your cancer risk?
Isn't fruit unhealthy except in low quantity?
Fruit contains fructose.
Edit: Forgot veggies. Not tgat it matters much, cause they are also somewhat impervious to accusation. Best I can say is that lot of them contain sugars, but that's weak on it's own. And lead, but that's mostly roadside ones xD
Sunlight literally birns your skin, even in small amounts.
Dunno about whole grains.
Exercise is literally damaging your body to rebuild it - done even slightly wrong can lead to long lasting problems.
Socialisation can easily turn into shunning, shaming and other mentally devastating actions over which you have no control whatsoever.
Easy creative hobbies...are a money drain. But that's not unhealthy so your point xD
As someone who is on the Irish scale of paleness I can assure you sunlight is not healthy for me.
Random? I’m not seeing a 15 kg slab of raw horsemeat, no charred emu leg hanging off the side, no half digested contents of crocodile stomach, no unidentifiable roadkill from somewhere in Georgia (the country, not the state, but the state will do, too), no puréed human back meat, not even so much as a speck of walrus, ostrich, cassowary, kangaroo, or beluga; guess otters, marmot, geese, dog and cat (I don’t like it either, but they did say “random” ffs) don’t count as having meat…
The fuck do you mean, random? That shit’s about as well ordered as the unabridged Oxford English Dictionary, ffs.
You had me until you said that Georgia the state is acceptable. Totally shattered my suspension of disbelief.
Pretty sure the state has its fair share of roadkill, just the country
Thinly sliced roadside sun dried leg of pitbull?
The dog, or Mr. Worldwide?
Random might not be the right word, can we settle on "anonymous"?
It sounds a bit sinister, sure, but underscores the whole don't-ask-don't-tell nature of the contents of charcuterie nicely.
I was in a punk band called Anonymous Meat. Most of our songs were about masked orgies and charcuterie taste testing.
How about “arbitrarily chosen”?
Assorted meat? Meat arrangement? Selected meats? Meat clusterfuck? So many choices.
It's a slate.
Portable sandwich bar
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