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Crypto genius (lemmy.world)
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[-] eezeebee@lemmy.ca 149 points 1 year ago

"while your investment appreciates in value", hopefully.

[-] Tubics@lemmy.world 39 points 1 year ago

Even if it loses 90% of its value it's still a win if the money came from credit cards you never paid back. Although the couple of hundred bucks you get might not be worth the hassle

[-] Wogi@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

You will also be unable to take out any debt upon release. It's difficult to get credit as a released felon without a history of defaulting on debt.

So, being generous and saying that he sees a 4% return on his investment, he'll have slightly more than he went in owing, and will be completely unable to even get a car loan, a decent job, or place to live.

He will have turned 0 dollars in to a lifetime of hardship.

[-] Sotuanduso@lemm.ee 22 points 1 year ago

Correction: He will have turned 0 dollars into a lifetime of hardship and a few hundred dollars.

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[-] saltnotsugar@lemm.ee 126 points 1 year ago

In prison.

Butthole destroyed.

Make check on coin.

Massive loss in value.

No.

[-] GlitterInfection@lemmy.world 90 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Just so you know you don't need to go to prison in order to get your butthole destroyed. It's much easier to just go on Grindr, which is only an emotional prison.

[-] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 24 points 1 year ago

Fun fact you also don't need to go to prison for your crypto to depreciate!

[-] nightwatch_admin@feddit.nl 23 points 1 year ago

There is a different story here, hidden beneath the floor boards.

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[-] Mamertine@lemmy.world 83 points 1 year ago

You'd still owe that debt. Unless you go to prison for live than the debt's statute length. Generally 7 years.

Also some jurisdictions make you pay for the privilege of going to prison.

Ymmv, choose your state of jurisdiction very carefully.

Also crypto is a bubble IMO.

[-] chuckleslord@lemmy.world 31 points 1 year ago

IMO nothing, it's pure speculation powered by nothing but blind greed. If it isn't a bubble, then nothing is.

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[-] walter_wiggles@lemmy.nz 67 points 1 year ago

I think you would make more money if you gave handys behind the Wendy's dumpster every day for 7 years.

[-] Blackmist@feddit.uk 57 points 1 year ago

> Realise you still owe the credit card debt.

[-] Deiv@lemmy.ca 34 points 1 year ago
[-] nonfuinoncuro@lemm.ee 18 points 1 year ago

I didn't just say it, I declared it

[-] CADmonkey@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Just commit a crime with a longer sentence than your state's statute of limitations.

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[-] AgentGrimstone@lemmy.world 52 points 1 year ago

You already fucked up in step 2

[-] AVincentInSpace@pawb.social 48 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Come to that you fucked up in step 1. Do you really think the credit card companies are gonna let that debt just sit there not accruing interest and not send debt collectors to your house while you're in jail?

[-] Kase@lemmy.world 34 points 1 year ago

Not if you sell your house to buy more crypto ;)

[-] Deiv@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 year ago
[-] Chickenstalker@lemmy.world 45 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Let's go one further:

  1. Get turned into a vampire

  2. Buy crypto

  3. Go sleep in your coffin for 100 years

  4. ???

  5. Profit

[-] independantiste@sh.itjust.works 24 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

~~5. Profit~~

  1. Realize it's at 0$

  2. Cry

  3. Remember you bought doge because Elon Musk said so

  4. Cry

[-] Ardiente@ttrpg.network 36 points 1 year ago
[-] PsychedSy@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 year ago

I mean if I had gone to jail right after I bought any of my crypto I'd be doing better. Sadly, it makes more sense to pull the crypto than default.

I think I had less than a cent of bitcoin and managed to pull 20 later (almost all of it) then another 20 later. Huge percent profit.

[-] jol@discuss.tchncs.de 34 points 1 year ago

You'll have to somehow launder that crypto first.

[-] ryathal@sh.itjust.works 32 points 1 year ago

You probably wouldn't need laundered crypto, but you would need to be able to hide it from the bankruptcy court. This only works if you can clear the credit card debt.

[-] Rin@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago

Monero doesn't need to be laundered.

[-] matter@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

It does if you want to spend it in any meaningful way

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[-] Armok_the_bunny@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago

What country does anon live in, where prison food and housing is free?

[-] unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de 40 points 1 year ago

a country that has any reasonable human rights?? well unless you mean "free" in the general sense in that someone does have to pay for it even if not the prisoner...

[-] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 27 points 1 year ago

(The shithole states charge prisoners for room and board)

[-] Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 1 year ago
[-] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 16 points 1 year ago

THE SHITHOLE STATES

CHARGE PRISONERS

FOR BEING IMPRISONED

Sorry I know sometimes you need to yell to be heard through the internet tubes

[-] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

The internet is not

the internet, is not a big truck

itititit's a series of TUBES

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[-] HipsterTenZero@dormi.zone 11 points 1 year ago

What do they do if you dont pay? throw you in double prison?

[-] sag@lemm.ee 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I know someone who did this. Now, He is in Loss.

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[-] Crack0n7uesday@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

Someone actually did this, then built a nuclear fallout shelter in their backyard in the middle of some city, but he did it all redneck and it blew up or something while building an underground generator or something and killed a 17 year old kid, he went back to jail, got out after another crypto spike, tried to cash out and immediately got sued by the family of the dead kid for wrongful death and got sued by the IRS for back taxes. It's a fucking rabbit hole of a story.

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[-] ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago

the IRS TAXMAN finds out and resizes anons rectum in search of the missing funds

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[-] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago
[-] yamapikariya@lemmyfi.com 25 points 1 year ago

Fast and easy way to contract a disease. Wouldn't recommend

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this post was submitted on 07 Dec 2023
682 points (96.6% liked)

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