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Death to America

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[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 45 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Of the many things I don't miss about living in CA, the grillman assholes that would passive-aggressively flick lawn service business cards on my steps, call "code enforcement" because there wasn't an HOA, and even snuck their mowers over to destroy my carefully cultivated and legal native plants as well as my edible gardens overnight under smug smirking plausibly deniable pretenses of "someone helping you out" is on the very top of that list.

[-] Tachanka@hexbear.net 37 points 2 months ago

snuck their mowers over to destroy my carefully cultivated and legal native plants as well as my edible gardens overnight under smug smirking plausibly deniable pretenses of "someone helping you out"

💀2️⃣🇺🇸

[-] DeathToBritain@hexbear.net 34 points 2 months ago

if that happened to me, I'd be placing some steel rods in the fucking grass next time to ding up the blades

[-] puff@hexbear.net 15 points 2 months ago

This country is absolutely irredeemable.

[-] blame@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago

shoulda put up a wall like you live in europe or something.

[-] huf@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

one of the weirdest fucking things about america, seriously. the lack of fences.

a people whose brains have been entirely cooked by "my house my castle" individualism bullshit, who live and breathe pRivAte ProPErtY, yet they dont put fences up?!

[-] dessalines@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 months ago

My best guess is that since lawns are bourgeois / aristocratic imitation, it's more about giving the appearance that your land has no limits. Going for this:

[-] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 35 points 2 months ago

Landlord won't let me replace the backyard with native ferns and forbs. angery

[-] machiabelly@hexbear.net 25 points 2 months ago

But what if it effects the property value?? negative

[-] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago

My landlord had a lawn but at some point become obsessed with astroturf with big rubber mats under it, so whenever it rains we get enormous puddles of weirdly clear water

[-] Inui@hexbear.net 18 points 2 months ago

I feel you but mainly because I get to hear a lawn mower almost every day since different people outside my apartment are mowing on different days. The noise pollution is unbearable sometimes.

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

The stench of two-stroke gas motors, especially from leafblowers and lawnmowers, produces many times as much effective pollution as a full-size SUV.

[-] ClimateChangeAnxiety@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago

Two-stroke engines need to be banned for most applications. Electric equipment only. And honestly even then I feel like you should need a permit to make that amount of noise, and it should be like the rules for animal research, you need a plan to replace or minimize where possible.

Do you really need to be weed whacking along that fence? Is it actually gonna be a problem? If so, do you really need to be doing it weekly? Would monthly suffice?

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago

Years ago, a particular most environmentally conscious leftist on Hexbear got really mad when I talked about how ruinous and wasteful two-stroke leaf blowers were. They said that rakes were impossible to use in their particular little lot of land, that electric leaf blowers were insufficient (and that I should buy them one if I wanted them to use one) and emphasized "you don't fucking know my situation" frothingfash

[-] SummerIsTooWarm@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago

I never had a situation where rakes were insufficient. Even if you want to remove leaves from long grass (for whatever reason), a rake with long prongs is sufficient. Blowers are just about convenience and speed. I hate them with passion, as you cannot block out the noise, even with a closed window and head between pillows. And while the electric ones are a bit better they're still way too noisy.

[-] huf@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

convenience? you blow your leaves across to your neighbors. then they come out with their leafblowers and blow it back.

back and forth forever.

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[-] ClimateChangeAnxiety@hexbear.net 3 points 2 months ago

And why are you removing the leaves from the grass in the first place? The grass is a great place for leaves to be. It’s where they belong.

If you’re using it to move leaves from pavement to the grass I understand more, but we’ve had a tool for that for thousands of years: A broom.

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[-] 2Password2Remember@hexbear.net 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

the fucking lawn machines are so loud and just constant. the suburbs are unironically louder than the city because of dipshits growing a crop of fucking grass

Death to America

[-] Feinsteins_Ghost@hexbear.net 13 points 2 months ago
[-] nothx@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago

I just cut mine, nothing special. Most of it is the leach field for the septic system, so it’s naturally healthy cuz of my poops. I do zero maintenance outside of cutting it once a week tho.

[-] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago

I like my little postage stamp of grass out back, but I'll eventually get rid of it. Working on mulching the fuck outta the front to replace it with low irrigation native pollinator treats

[-] BodyBySisyphus@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago

Currently trying to get rid of a lawn and boy howdy is it a pain in the derriere

[-] Assian_Candor@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago

I smothered mine it was a lot of work

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[-] Aru@lemmygrad.ml 8 points 2 months ago

Okay, I did it

what's your next order?

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[-] sexywheat@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago

what if they have a bunch of trees and are used to grow vegetables and shit?

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 17 points 2 months ago

grillman hates when any land outside a house is used for anything but nonedible fuzzy green squares of obedience.

I say this from previous experience. If it's edible, if bees like it, if it's actually harmonious with the local ecosystem, they will destroy it themselves if they can get away with it.

[-] sexywheat@hexbear.net 13 points 2 months ago
[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 15 points 2 months ago

Suburb brain comes from an old england-cool tradition of flexing on the poors by having land that was not used to grow food. I am not kidding. That was the flex.

[-] wtypstanaccount04@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago

The idea of American suburbs is that everyone (read: settlers) will live like royalty. You will have your own horse and buggy (SUV), and you will be so wealthy that your land is simply used to grow grass, as a flex. It is a celebration of excess.

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[-] huf@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago

yeah but oaks dont grow food either, they could plant oaks. they're trees. they're amazing. more trees.

it would provide shade in the summer, lowering the AC bills. for fuck's sake.

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[-] CarbonScored@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago

I think it was first (or at least equally) a flex by france-cool , and quickly spread from there.

[-] huf@hexbear.net 3 points 2 months ago

it's even worse. the front yards are totally open, no fence or hedge, so they're 100% unusable. i'll never understand why americans dont put a fence across their front yard.

unless it's to hide the fact that the public land their roads are on arent wide enough to have a reasonable sized road and on both sides, a verge of trees, a sidewalk and another verge of trees (this could be in the private front yards of the houses).

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[-] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

Lawn veggies are class traitors

[-] FloridaBoi@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago

I mow the weeds. Zero other maintenance. Lawn is full of clover and other random weeds. It’s patchy but generally green looking at it from the street which is enough to keep the HOA off my ass

[-] puff@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

No such thing as a weed. Let it grow.

[-] Abracadaniel@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

hace you ever heard of invasive species?

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[-] ClimateChangeAnxiety@hexbear.net 3 points 2 months ago

Nah it’s Florida there are invasives and sand spurs You do really want to get rid of these fucking things, they hurt so bad

[-] American_Badass@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago

God, I have a ton of lawn. Few acres of it, really. Got quite a bit more of other stuff. I gotta figure out what I'm gonna do with it.

Right now my back field is just all grown up and a guy cuts it for hay. I'm planning on a wildflower meadow back there, and keeping some bees. Gotta get my tractor ready and all planned out to see what I'm gonna plant and how I'm gonna do it.

The lawn portion I'm not sure. My food plot will go there certainly, but that's only so much. Maybe I'll tear it out and do all clover at first. Idk. I'm open to suggestions.

[-] Cataphract@lemmy.ml 10 points 2 months ago

If you're actually going for real nature, consider your local ecology. Do not by a large pack of wildflowers because those are nationally packed and usually aren't considered native so can be invasive (which can also effect your local wildlife and the plant won't fair as well in extreme's for the area that a local plant would survive). Remember, bugs and animals come back to an area knowing a certain species of plant is there for them to survive or reproduce at, making more competition they aren't familiar with harms their chances.

I would consider letting it grow naturally up and if you really want to do something than let the neighbor know so they stop cutting it down for hay (just make sure you're actually gonna do something with it). Let the natural seeds that distribute get into the area and establish. Learn to take clippings and identify local flora when you see a cool plant you want, like a more scientific pokemon game if that interests you.

I'm doing something similar with some acres the previous owners just continued to massacre with mowing and looked like a barren wasteland. It took a few years for the right establishing plants to grow up and protect the other smaller and more delicate plants but this year is the first year it looks like a natural environment. I've been identifying what each growth is and it's been fascinating researching them. Right now it's a mini bee sanctuary because something is always in bloom and for the times only one plant-type is blooming I'm taking clippings and propagating them elsewhere on the property so there's always a bunch of flowers at any point in the year.

I would start with propping up your local bee community since they survive on their own and you may fall in love with them. I have a bunch of ground and carpenter bee's in my area that I don't want to harm with an invasive colony like the honey bee's. There's also TONS of local honey producers so I just feel like I'm running after a gimmick since it's already available and there are bee groups I can join that go to all the different farms for education and socializing. Any bee person would love some help if you went out and joined them.

If you want to get really technical, there's landscaping creating berms and swales etc. But to get started I suggest watching some Andrew Millison videos as he's great with visuals and knows his stuff when it comes to permaculture. How to Fix a Broken Ecosystem

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[-] Assian_Candor@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago

If you have a tractor you are made in the shade. Kill the lawn by repeated tilling then plant wildflower seeds from Ernst

Here is a good PDF guide for organic site prep

https://xerces.org/sites/default/files/2018-05/16-027_02_XercesSoc_Organic-Site-Preparation-for-Wildflower-Establishment_web.pdf

Reach out to your state's department of conservation they love encouraging this and are happy to help

[-] American_Badass@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago

I do have a tractor, which I absolutely love. Unfortunately, my beautiful old gal is going to the tractor doctor, but trying to get her ready to plant this fall.

Yeah, I talked to a department of natural resources guy at the state fair, and received a free packet of wildflower seeds, but I need like a few hundred pounds of it. I gotta email some people.

I'll check these links, hopefully find a good seed mix.

[-] Assian_Candor@hexbear.net 4 points 2 months ago

https://www.ernstseed.com/ for seeds

Your dnr can recommend a species blend and Ernst will mix it up for you. If you truly need hundreds of pounds it's gonna be eye wateringly expensive. I think I paid like 300 bucks for 4000 square feet worth. Then the septic failed and half of it got dug up lol.

I would do a small space first and see if it takes. There might even be grants and stuff for doing large areas.

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[-] Belly_Beanis@hexbear.net 6 points 2 months ago

They're such a waste of land and resources. Would love to have useful plants growing around my neighborhood. Or even just some sheds/outdoor storage. But no. We have to have these stupid fucking lawns in front of every house for the entire town.

[-] Des@hexbear.net 5 points 2 months ago

i tried wilding my little forward strip but unfortunately my neighboor's derelict property has those aggressive tree of heaven and my sewer and water pipe runs through there.

so it has to stay cut grass (including the root suckers/saplings) or i will have very expensive repairs to do

[-] krolden@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 months ago

Even if its full of native flowers covered with pollinators?

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this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2024
122 points (95.5% liked)

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