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Trolley problem (sh.itjust.works)
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[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 229 points 4 months ago

Option 3 means that the Javascript standards team dies either way, right? Number 3. No hesitation.

[-] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 67 points 4 months ago

the c++ team is a sacrifice I'm willing to make. can we just shoot Brendan Eich in the head if he's not in there too?

[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 40 points 4 months ago

Push him onto the pressure pad. Make it his fault.

[-] RoyaltyInTraining@lemmy.world 12 points 4 months ago

I feel like all C++ does these days is badly and very slowly copy other languages. It wouldn't be a huge loss.

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[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 81 points 4 months ago

Javascript Standards Team is such an Oxymoron.

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[-] rimjob_rainer@discuss.tchncs.de 62 points 4 months ago
[-] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 19 points 4 months ago
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[-] bleistift2@sopuli.xyz 48 points 4 months ago

“You and your entire family” means “All life on Earth”.

That should make the decision somewhat easier.

[-] Zozano@aussie.zone 11 points 4 months ago

By my definition, family is who you treat like family.

[-] Donkter@lemmy.world 6 points 4 months ago

I try to treat everyone I meet like family

[-] trxxruraxvr@lemmy.world 11 points 4 months ago

If you make it "all human live" it starts to look quite attractive again

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[-] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 29 points 4 months ago

there might be an argument that JavaScript kills more than a nuclear bomb

[-] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 28 points 4 months ago

Ok so this one just isn't fair.

Two possibilities end up with me dead, two end up with millions dead, and one ends up with me being unemployed.

Sorry not sorry Team A and B, sacrifices must be made.

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[-] zib@lemmy.world 25 points 4 months ago

I'd take my odds with the bottom track.

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[-] ICastFist@programming.dev 20 points 4 months ago

I've played enough X-COM to know that 50/50 is actually 100%, I just don't know which way. Better trigger it!!

[-] darkbaron202@lemmy.world 9 points 4 months ago

30%? Let me deliver that shot with crit across the map to your teammate hunkered down behind full cover for you!

[-] passiveaggressivesonar@lemmy.world 20 points 4 months ago
[-] superkret@feddit.org 17 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Assuming it is in the US, at 4.5 million it can only be San Francisco/Oakland/Berkeley.

[-] underisk@lemmy.ml 33 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

would the bomb also kill javascript and C++ or would I have to keep throwing trolleys at it until I get both silicon valley and the JS/C++ devs?

[-] jol@discuss.tchncs.de 19 points 4 months ago

At that distance it also kills you, so it sounds like a good deal. No regrets.

[-] underisk@lemmy.ml 7 points 4 months ago

win win win

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[-] samus12345@lemm.ee 19 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Well, you can take yourself out of the equation because you're not tied down and can just move after flipping the switch.

chooses bottom track

"C'mon...c'mon!"

trolley heads towards committe members

"Dammit!"

runs over and jumps on the nuclear bomb pressure pad

[-] Rivalarrival@lemmy.today 19 points 4 months ago

A Mark VI only has a 18 to 160 kiloton yield.

Can we replace it with a B83?

[-] AceFuzzLord@lemm.ee 14 points 4 months ago

I'll take the 50/50 because those are some damn good odds!

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[-] Evotech@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago

Am I in the Metropolitan area?

[-] Ashelyn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 points 4 months ago

You are on track A and the bomb is within sight. If you get the shit end of the 50/50, everyone in the diagram would be vaporized instantly

[-] stevedice@sh.itjust.works 16 points 4 months ago

So you're saying there's a 100% chance the comitees get vaporized by choosing the bottom track.

[-] Ashelyn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 4 months ago

Well, no.

In scenario A they are instantly vaporized. In scenario B they are brutally sliced into multiple pieces and crushed to death, rather painfully depending on the speed of the trolley.

[-] stevedice@sh.itjust.works 8 points 4 months ago

You need to study up on your trolleys. That's clearly a Vaporizer Trolleynator 3000.

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[-] Whorehoarder@lemmynsfw.com 8 points 4 months ago

Are we in the blast zone of the nuke?

[-] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 13 points 4 months ago

Maybe we could use Javascript to direct a simple robot to set the lever while we remain at a safe distance?

Maybe the real solution to this diagram is to nuke it from orbit.

[-] seang96@spgrn.com 7 points 4 months ago

But the robot has to run windows vista

[-] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 months ago

And have a valid Apple developer account?

[-] dosuser123456@lemmy.sdf.org 6 points 4 months ago

sudo rm train.sh

problem solved 👍

[-] DontMakeMoreBabies@lemm.ee 5 points 4 months ago

Fuck the metro I guess.

[-] Nublets@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago

Middle track. Then I have plenty of time to hotwire the nuke with my handy dandy mallet

[-] Iceman@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago

There is at least one user here in the superposition of being on two tracks at once.

[-] zzx@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago

I like those odds

[-] Ziglin@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago

Now how do I get it to drift over everything but teams a and b?

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this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2025
584 points (96.1% liked)

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