829
submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by sag@lemm.ee to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world

I am supportive of you being Canadian

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[-] owenfromcanada@lemmy.world 107 points 11 months ago

"What's your gender?"

"Canadian."

"No, who do you like?"

"Donuts."

"No no, what's in your pants?"

"Polite manners."

[-] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 46 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

"No, no, I'm talking about your genitals."

"Oh, you mean Tim Horton's?"

[-] JimVanDeventer@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

Fun fact: timbits were named so in honour of his fatal drunk driving car accident.

[-] Sparky@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 11 months ago

"what's in your pants?"

"a party you're not invited to"

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 7 points 11 months ago

"a hockey knife"

[-] andshit@lemmy.world 17 points 11 months ago

Doughnuts**

[-] CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works 5 points 11 months ago

As a Canadian, I know you are American from your spelling of doughnuts.

[-] owenfromcanada@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Surprise, I'm both!

[-] phx@lemmy.ca 2 points 11 months ago
[-] GrymEdm@lemmy.world 49 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

We are sorry to hear you are disappointed with the Canadian gender identity. Please hold if you wish to express your concerns to one of our agents. Alternatively, courses on the benefits and challenges of being Canadian and what it means to be hockeysexual are available in English and French. Completion of the course grants access to free-but-slow healthcare and a $25 Tim Hortons gift card.

[-] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 11 months ago

Please hold if you wish to express your disappointment to one of our agents.

I just want to say replacing fig leaves with maple leaves is rough because it leaves a bunch of sticky on your junk.

[-] SurfinBird@lemmy.ca 16 points 11 months ago

Maple syrup on your junk is a proud Canadian Thanksgiving tradition.

[-] CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works 1 points 11 months ago

I was sick and family was busy. So I missed thanksgiving this year.

[-] rbesfe@lemmy.ca 12 points 11 months ago

pour le service en français, appuyez sur le 2

[-] raynethackery@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Why isn't the first option?

[-] muyessir@lemmy.world 15 points 11 months ago
[-] connaisseur@lemmy.ca 14 points 11 months ago

Huge missed opportunity: could have been God made Adam and Eve, not Maple and Leaf

[-] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 13 points 11 months ago

There is no such thing as 'Canadian', it's just a phase!

[-] Moose@moose.best 12 points 11 months ago

Pretty sure he did say Adam and Moose.

[-] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 6 points 11 months ago

Hey, Adam; watch me pull a rabbit outta my hat!

[-] capt_wolf@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I think he said moose and squirrel!

[-] letsgo@lemm.ee 4 points 11 months ago

Naah, Moose came later, he was the chap who came down from a mountain with a couple of iPads, then drove out of the desert in a Triumph, or something like that.

[-] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 2 points 11 months ago

The Book of Mormon is a wild ride.

[-] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 11 months ago

No spoilers please!

[-] raynethackery@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Wasn't she on YCDTOTV?

[-] militaryintelligence@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

My pronouns are Canadian/Eh

[-] monsterpiece42@reddthat.com 10 points 11 months ago

I'm guessing this is not a required demographic question in Canada.

[-] micka190@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

Might be a case where Canadian applicants submit another form that has the relevant information in a different format too.

[-] ZeffSyde@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I called out a form and one of the options was for diet. The choices were:

Omnivore, Vegetarian, Vogon.

[-] Jiggle_Physics@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

those scintillating, jeweled, scuttling crabs are good though.

[-] watersnipje@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Just don’t allow them to recite poetry at you

[-] 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com 7 points 11 months ago

One assumes it's either customary or law not to ask if it's not relevant.

[-] ekZepp@lemmy.world 7 points 11 months ago
[-] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

I'm an American. I actually like America, for what it's worth. Canada, however, has the superior anthem.

[-] jaybone@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

Is this Windows95?

[-] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 11 months ago

Our country reeks of trees / our Yaks are really large

[-] not_woody_shaw@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

And they smell like rotting beefcarcasses.

[-] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Probably just a cut and paste error, still funny.

this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2024
829 points (99.1% liked)

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