751
How to become irresistible
(lemmy.world)
Bro's running an Inn.
More like a broth-el 🥸
Fuck off lmao. I love these but feel like such an idiot when I laugh at them.
Me too. I laughed like a maniac at it and then felt bad I had no one to share the joke with.
A man that has his own place and can cook? Hell I'd be eating there in no time.
As a dude with his own place who cooks almost every day and generally has some leftover homemade barbecue, it definitely works. I just don't want people over at my house.
As a German dude, 6 bottles of Bavarian beer should count as an invitation to a fine pal auch as you. Do we have a deal xD
As a drunk, that sounds like a great deal. If you want barbecue you'll have to wait for the weather to clear up. If you don't mind slow cooker pulled pork, I plan on using the leftovers from yesterday to make carnitas tacos with onions, cilantro, and homemade avocado salsa this evening before I go get sloppy drunk at open mic night.
Full disclosure: I did something different. Instead of onions and cilantro with an avocado salsa I made pico, added avocado chunks, and plopped that on top of my crisped up pulled pork with extra spices.
But the German with beer didn't drop by so I guess it doesn't matter. I'm very sad now.
He's not wrong. I've brought women home many times by cooking for them. Guys, learn a few easy recipes and you won't regret it. My go to is chicken and broccoli alfredo or carbonara fettuccine.
Nothing sexier than a belly full of cream and cheese.
My favorite go to recipe is a lentil soup with spinach, lime, coconut milk, and curry. It's really refreshing, especially after a hard day of carrying bridges across the Shattered Plains.
Always a risk that airsick lowlanders may not like it though
That sounds delicious, and healthy!
Found Benjamin Sisko's account.
But yeah, even simple cooking is great.
Found Benjamin Sisko’s account.
Crock pot stew is barely any effort too
Yet they taste so good on a winter day
When I was dating that was basically my go-to reason for inviting someone over, but that usually was at least 3-5 dates in. Usually we'd have eaten at cool restaurants where we've had full blown conversations about food, and where I'll have introduced the idea that I'm a great cook who knows what I'm doing, and then at a certain point I'd offer my place for a dinner date, and then show off. And we'd already be alone at my place so it wasn't that much of a stretch for them to stay over.
Honestly I don't know how I would've approached dating if I didn't know how to cook.
I tried that once. She ate my Thai curry, made polite conversation, and left.
Still a nice evening, though.
Maybe she hates curry
Try roasting the broccoli first, assuming you don't already.
Good suggestion. I usually steam them since I like the florets still crunchy. I'll try roasting next time!
It brings out a whole new world of flavor. Truly surprising. Just toss with a little olive oil and bake at 450 degrees for 15 minutes or so.
A girl once asked my friend and I if she could make us an omelette. We'd never met her before, but said yeah why not. We went back to our flat, like 1AM, she made us an omelette and then left. Never saw her again. Bizarre. Good omelette though.
You've been visited by the Omelette du Goblin. Pay tribute with a Dexter's Lab short or be visited one again.
When someone offers to make you an omelette, you can expect a reasonably good omelette
By the way, my name is Stu
Then you follow him home, the door opens and another guy shakes your hand and says "Hi, I'm Stu."
violent story, cannibalism, gunshot, satire, fbi agent
It turns out that "this dude" is a serial killer and cannibal.
Stu, who has been his roommate for the past month, and Angela, who may soon be dead, are both terrified upon realizing this.
The man-eater locks the door, trapping them.
— Well, well, well... look at what we have here! Fresh meat. — he says, menacingly.
Little did the man know that Stu was actually an FBI agent sent to investigate cannibals. Sounds of gunshot are heard from the cannibal's home. Stu saves the day yet again. The end. And everyone clapped, menacingly.
this comment felt like i got punched in the chest
thanks
Used to be a cook and I can't tell you how often "going out is expensive, I could cook you something better" used to work in my youth
"it worked on me too" - OP is slightly ambiguous about how the story ends.
Hands off my stew, harlot!
Hands off my harlot, Stu!
You may fascinate a woman with a bowl of stew.
this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2024
751 points (99.1% liked)
Curated Tumblr
3860 readers
491 users here now
For preserving the least toxic and most culturally relevant Tumblr heritage posts.
Image descriptions and plain text captions of written content are expected of all screenshots. Here are some image text extractors (I looked these up quick and will gladly take FOSS recommendations):
-web
-iOS
Please begin copied raw text posts (lacking a screenshot that makes it apparent it is from Tumblr) with:
# This has been reposted here to Lemmy as part of the "Curated Tumblr Project."
I made the icon using multiple creative commons svg resources, the banner is this.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS